Names

Tetsu and Leiya don't like it when I just babble on this blog. They want pictures. I'm babbling today.

Yesterday the telephone rang.

"Hello? Is this Grace? (my mother.)"

"No. This is Tani, her daughter."

"Hi Tani! This is Mary." (mother's good friend who is in a retirement center now.) "I called a couple of weeks ago and made arrangements to have lunch with your mother." (Oh no. I never heard about that. I hope we didn't miss a luncheon date.) "But for the life of me I can't remember when we arranged the date." (Ah... Sounds familiar. Mary and my mother are around the same age...) "And also, I thought about inviting your mother's friend from church who lives here but I can't remember her name. I don't remember names so well anymore. The lady is disabled I think..."

"Oh yes! The sight impaired lady. She had a seeing-eye dog named Digger. Doris somebody? I don't remember her last name. Mother~! Do you remember the last name of Doris somebody with the seeing-eye dog?"

"Doris? Doris? Hmmm... I don't remember..."

"Sorry Mary. She doesn't remember."

"Well I don't either... I'll see if I can find out another way. And then I'll try to get us all together for lunch. Let's see... I don't remember your name either..."

"I'm Tani, Mary. I hope you figure out who Doris is and I hope we get to see you."

So Mary and mother are in the same boat and nobody remembers names. Including me... I've met Doris a number of times but I don't remember her last name either. Doesn't it figure that the dog's name who's been gone for years, popped into my head right away.

We ARE a bunch aren't we.

Family days

We had our funeral yesterday and I think everyone feels at peace about the last two months. I doubt my blog friends want to see funeral pictures and I don't think Marcy wants me to share those private moments but Takumi and I stood on the sidelines and commented at how different a Southern California funeral is from a Japanese funeral. Here are the kids hanging out in the driveway beforehand waiting for the adults to get their acts together.

My son did join us and I loved standing next to him when he looks spiffed up a bit.

He spent the morning and later afternoon doing new and mysterious things to my computer and trying to get me to remember all the wonderful new commands and windows and sites. My head doesn't follow well and he was disappointed in my lack of awe and enthusiasm.

My brother asked if I'd do some sewing for him. He brought me a lawn chair... It seems the nylon canvas had ripped but we determined there was no way to remove the canvas from the chair so he held onto the chair while I ran the sewing machine. And I did such a good job that he went rummaging through his garage junk and found another chair for me to repair. It pays to have a sister who sews. Of course he ends up feeding me the whole summer so I'm getting the better deal.

"Hi, Keion. Smile!"

"Ooh. Get away from me. Sister cooties!"

Look fast. This is one of the rare pictures we have of my brother smiling...

"Maturity"

Seeing my American family only once a year I really notice the changes that 12 months make. I've already mentioned how my mother has aged but the rest of the family is showing their "maturity" too.

In Colin's case it really does seem like maturity. He is not at all as argumentative as he was last year (but I can't believe there will not be more of it in the future. He still hasn't hit the teenage years and you know what that means!) With very little grumbling he takes out the garbage and answers Grandma's questions. And a couple of days ago I found him hammering away on the back porch all by himself. I went out to check.

"Colin, what are you doing?"

"I'm fixing the stairs."

Colin had a handful of screws and a power drill that looked very dangerous.

"Colin! Does your dad know you're using his tools?"

"Yeah, Auntie Tani. He told me to fix the stairs."

So I watched and you know what? He fixed those stairs!!!

Kiana, I am surprised to find, does her part in the kitchen. She made Chicken Parmesan for us one night and she seems to be taking an interest in cooking and helping Marcy when schedules get tight. I don't think I knew my way around a kitchen when I was 15. (Nor at 55.)

Marcy doesn't change much. Doesn't get older. Laughs a lot.

My brother has settled into middle age. He looks the best of everyone because he's lost a lot of weight. Of course when I asked him to do something on the computer for me he was squinting a lot so I had to lend him my reading glasses... Yep. More "mature".

And me... 55 and counting. I was horrified to find this sign in a store that officially includes me in the senior group. At 55! I don't know if I'm happy or upset about getting the discount!

Backing

I made it to JoAnn's. Only here a week and I've made three trips.

Do you remember the Orange and Cherry Jubilee quilt? A few months ago I hauled it off the shelf and wondered what to do about quilting it. I decided I would bring it to the States and find someone who did long arm quilting as a business. But then June, one of my blogging friends, offered to quilt it for me if I could send it to her. And this is what I'm trying to do. Buy backing, sew it up, send the backing and quilt to June.

How much backing do I have to buy? As well as we could Marcy and I spread out the quilt and measured. Added extra inches so that the quilt can be secured to the machine... and then figured out inches to yards... I need such-and-such amount of wide backing. I think... (My math is not too good.) Marcy looked at me blankly since she didn't really understand why the needed extra nor what wide backing might be anyway. Kiana got in on the figuring (inches to feet, feet to yards) but she didn't understand either.

Marcy took me to JoAnn's. Only dark blue and brown colored wide backings. Two days later I was at another JoAnn's. Same assortment. Rats. But that's okay! There were all these pretty calicoes and I didn't really mind paying full price since even then they are about the third of the Japanese prices. I picked out something suitable and carried my bolt (and my quilt so that the lady could re-measure it!) to the cutting desk. This is NOT wide backing so I had to double my figures, right?

"Oh yes. You need 5 1/2 yards."

Good, good. Get my big hunk of fabric and I go home happy, stuff it in the washer drier, cut my fabric in half, cut off the selvages and sew it up. Halfway home! Marcy and I lay out the backing and the quilt. NOT ENOUGH FABRIC!

Arrghh! Not only am I not good in math, I didn't even question the fabric lady's calculations!!! Marcy tells me not to panic. All I need is to buy another panel of fabric the same size as the length of my backing. (2 3/4 yards) I CAN DO THIS!!!

Yesterday I went back to JoAnn's, pulled the bolt off the shelf (it's on sale!) and ask for 2 3/4 yards.

"Sorry. There is only 2 yards and 17 inches."

This is the Law of Murphy.

"Give me what you've got."

I also bought fabric scissors since I'd been cutting the backing with Marcy's cooking scissors.

Cut off the selvages. Cut the fabric in half. Sew together. Sew the half to the other backing. Am I done?

Let's check ONE MORE TIME. Marcy and I spread the backing on the lawn and put the quilt down on top of it. IT DOESN'T FIT!!! Lord! What am I doing wrong?!!!

"Tani, calm down! It'll fit! You just need to sew that extra little strip you have over there along this edge."

So I did. And the quilt fits. I think. The backing has nearly as much patchwork on it as the front.

June... I hope you don't think I'm a crazy woman when this quilt gets to you...

Un-busy

A few weeks ago at the height of my busyness I had a post mulling about my head about being busy. (I got too busy to write that post.) It seemed like every time someone asked me how I was I'd smile hugely and say,

"Oh, fine, fine. Keeping busy!"

Somewhere in the back of my head I equated that with

"Fine, fine. I'm so necessary to life that I don't have a minute for myself. Aren't I wonderful?"

Many, many, many years ago I remember a young missionary in Japan bemoaning the fact that some of the older missionaries were always "busy" and they reveled in their busyness. The younger man just didn't have a lot to do yet. He still didn't speak much Japanese and the churches who called for him to speak were in a ways doing him a favor... The veteran missionaries were running from church to church giving Bible studies, preaching the morning sermon, attending ladies' meetings and teaching Sunday School.

"It's not all that virtuous being busy! It doesn't leave time for the smaller things!"

Now I'm in Southern California which might be ranked as one of the most schedule-packed, race-about cultures in the world. Fast freeways, fast food and instant communication. Everyone is busy. Except for me... Except for Grandma. The two of us sit here and look at each other. Grandma's conversation leaves a little to be desired, not that she doesn't try. It's just at about the third cycle of repetitions I start answering in grunts.

I wonder if this is how dementia grows. It is like the chicken and the egg theory. Is it because my mother has nothing to do that she can no longer concentrate on things around her? Or is it because she can no longer concentrate that she has nothing to do? She used to love jig-saw puzzles but the one Marcy and Keion gave her for Christmas was dusty and fading on the cardboard table when I got here with only the edges completed. She has lost interest in that completely.

My mother used to love to read and her early retirement days would be spent reading book after book with each title written down carefully in a notebook along with the starting and ending date. This year she takes no interest in books and though I cajoled her into joining me on a trip to the library she wasn't interested in looking at the bookshelves.

As for me, I am also a great devourer of books (when I can get them) and I'm already finished with the books I checked out at the library. I've read my Kindle.

"What's that?"

"It's called a Kindle. I can read books in it. Do you want to try?"

"Do you mean to tell me there's a whole book in that thing? How can that be? Where are the pages?"

Some things are just too hard to explain and I don't even understand them myself!

Yesterday I sat around thinking how I would be in seventh heaven if I had all this time and a quilt to work on. So dumb not to have brought more sewing. Marcy gives me access to her cars but I only feel comfortable driving one of them. So I sat "un-busy".

I suppose I could pray. I am always too busy to do that. Or write letters. (e-mails are out. The Internet doesn't work in my mother's house.) Thank goodness my mother has never had a TV. I don't think I could sit and watch that all day without losing some of my brain cells too. Not too much cleaning to do this year...

"What'cha reading, Mother?"

"I don't know..."

I'm going to JoAnn's today...

California scenery

You are all going to be tired of morning walks but we are all so heat doped around here nothing much else gets done unless it is done at 6:00 am. Kiana wasn't in her bed this morning (I wondered if she were trying to avoid my morning walk invitation. Maybe she was only trying to escape from the heat.) so I decided to take the scenic route. I guess these pictures are for my Japanese friends who might find Southern California terrain interesting.

This is the road above my brother's home. There's a trail going up over the city but I've never been up there. Not many trees and I think the coyotes live up there. No thank you.

The houses overlooking the valley. But you can see how dry it is when the land doesn't get watered.

A composite picture of the valley.

There is Ikea in the distance. There are so many things from there that I wish I could squeeze into my suitcase!

Cactus, cactus and more cactus.

My every year picture of the shrubbery back lit by the morning sun.

Palm trees. Yep. We know we are in Southern California. (Unfortunately the haze/smog lets us know we are here too.)

Years and years ago a Chinese family erected 4 plaster lions in front of their house. A little out of place but picturesque..

Yes, yours truly in walking attire.

And back home after an hour and 15 minutes. Good. Now I don't have to feel guilty if I eat a pastrami sandwich today.

Summer fun

It has been a hot couple of days around here and the whole family piled into the swimming pool trying to cool off.

Even Grandma and the dogs got in there! Well, the dogs swim... Grandma doesn't. She wanted to get her feet wet but I was afraid the sun would be too strong for her so I rigged up a "tent" made of her walker and a large beach towel. Who knew that a walker could be so versatile! Grandma enjoyed being part of the playtime and cooling off.















I found Grandma sitting on the porch looking out in space (yes, she's in a jacket! Why in this heat?!) and took out some handwork to keep her company. She found this quite a fascinating process and "helped" by holding pieces.

"I don't see how you have the patience to do all that!"

"How many of these are you going to make?"

"How many more do you have to do?"

In the course of 30 minutes I heard those lines about 10 times...







And this was the result. I had cut two sets of the Alabama Beauty block to carry on the plane with me (yes, in the last 20 minutes before leaving to catch the bus!) but didn't get much done on the flight over. I did NOT bring the templates with me so no more on this project I guess.